The activity of smoking a thick bark of malana cream, over an Indian cigar.

Regular prayers that have to be done every sunrise and sunset by poonal-potta Brahmins (i.e. Brahmins with Sacred Thread). The threading ceremony is called Upanayanam. The most important part of Sandhyavandanam is the Gayatri Mantra, which is top secret.

Sometimes, it's possible to simply be born at the wrong time. Here, one doesn't mean born during the wrong era, though one can wish fervently that Brian Lara could have played in the era of T20 games and minted a fortune, or have competed more with Sachin Tendulkar for cricket glory. No, one means, say, that you were born on July 20, 1982 (Prince William) or November 1, 1973 (Aishwarya Rai). Timings are everything, whether we're talking about gents timings or ladies timings. You see, both Aishwarya Rai and Prince William are mangliks, born in the condition of Mangal Dosha, which is an astrological combination that occurs if Mars is in the 1st,2nd, 4th, 7th, 8th, or 12th house of the Vedic astrology Ascendant chart. Then, gone case only. This has been proved by Vedic Science.

If you are a manglik, the angry astral effects of Mars will, according to Vedic astrology, make you a terrible spouse. You will sow disharmony in your wake. Your husband or wife might die. You yourself are virtually a walking soocide case. But wait! All is not lost. There is a cure.

If you marry a tree first, such as a Peepal tree, and then have it cut, OR marry a matka and then have it broken, the ill effects of your astrally doomed birthday are negated. Or, if you marry another manglik, the negative vibes you both exert on each other will cancel each other out. One doesn't know how this works egjactly, but one supposes that two fiery Martians experience what one can only read about in books (see kamasutra for a brief overview).

So, to summarize: two mangliks in love? Good. One manglik loving a non-manglik? Sadly, this is a formula for lau failure, unless you first find an aboreal roadside romeo, marry your dau off to it, then kill the tree. It's complicated, but what to say? WALTO.

Another 'gate' has emerged since Coalgate. Basically a rich Indian family (the Gupta brothers) in South Africa took Indian wedding extravagance to the next level and chartered a private jet for their guests. They had so much pull that they got special perm to land the jet on a military base near the capital, Pretoria.

We don't find this that surprising. Our regular aam aadmi types are known to have elephants, 500 person gueslists and five thousand plates of gajar ka halwa at their weddings; so a little extra dhinchak at a rich mans wedding with Bollywood stars, government officials and privileged access to air strips is de rigueur

Male circumcision.

Yugadi is the New Year's festival for people of the Deccan Region of India (Karnataka, Maharashtra, AP, Tamil Nadu & Kerala).

It's name comes from the Sanskrit words yuga ("age") + adi ("new"') ie "the beginning of a new age". It's that day of the year when people take a break and say no to work. They get together in welcoming spring. The day begins with everyone wearing new clothes and offering prayers at temples. Bevu Bella (a mix of neem leaves and flowers and jaggery) is prepared and everyone partakes of it - driving home the message that both joy (jaggery) and sorrow (bitter neem) should be taken in the right spirit.

Its a day of institutionalized loafing and TP

Like in most religions, fasting is an important duty of a practising Hindu. Hindu fasts are undertaken for various reasons, & some are performed on specific days of the week to honour certain gods; for example, Monday is the day of Lord Shiva, Tuesday - Goddess Kali & Hanuman, Wednesday - Lord Krishna , Thursday - Lord Vishnu, Friday - Santoshi Ma, Saturday - Lord Shani.

And Sunday?

I dont know pa. All i know is that its the first day of the week here in the Gelf where I live, & i need a pair of pliers to keep my eyes open.

Anyone can observe these fasts, obviously, but its often the lady of the house who undertakes to do it on behalf of her family members. So if you ask her to join you in a sea-food buffet at West End on a Monday afternoon, you might hear her exclaim: ''But today is my Monday!'' Its a quaint Indian usage which means s/he's fasting for _____ (refer list & affix appropriate god's name), & cannot partake of non-vegetarian food/ drinks/ whole grains/ root vegetables/ or whatever on that day.

The Kumbh Mela is a mass pilgrimage of Hindus that takes place in the holy cities of Allahabad/ Ujjain/ Nasik or Haridwar. Rumoured to be the largest gathering of human-kind in the world. Involves a Godly tiff over a pot of nectar, dips in the sacred rivers of Hinduism, sadhus, stampedes & cholera epidemics. It happens once every 6 or 12 or 144 years, depending. Depending on what? minns, Thatandoldonask. I humbly ask sorry, but I don’t know.

Our national interest in the Kumbh Mela, however, lies not in its logic & reasoning. Our interest, my dear friends, lies in brothers separated at birth.

Instead of drumming their fingers bekaarly on a table, Bollywood pitchers decided to go all out & separate brothers at birth. I mean, whose father what goes. And the Kumbh Mela has provided the most seamless setting for this separation. The story kinda goes thus: an amazingly foresightful mother gives each of her sons one half of a locket that is split in two, & takes them on a pilgrimage. The brothers are separated in the teeming madness of the Kumbh Mela, & are raised in entirely different circumstances. One turns out good & the other bad. They finally face each other as adults, wanting to do nothing but kill each other. Which is when one spots the locket hanging from the other’s neck & understand yavrything. They tumble into each others’ arms in joy & go home dancingly.

The Kumbh Mela soon became an urban legend among engsters of our generation, providing way too many reasons to crack way too many pjs involving crowd-like situations and recognizing each other's jewellery.

But dheere-dheere, Bollywood moved on to bigger & badder things, & poor Kumbh Mela was all but forgotten..

A mutt is a term used for a Hindu monastic and/or religious establishment with a lineage, which has rules and is hierarchical. It's the short form of the word Matha. This term has nothing to do with the English word mutt meaning dog.

literally means, Oh God, oh my gawwd or causually used phrases for extreme tiredness or when you have given up all hope in life, and there's an incoming storm while you are living in a house built of packs of playing cards (peka mukkalu).