Diwali: The Festival of Lights - In Focus - The Atlantic
Surfing Possibility: India's First Surfer Girl
If you are a manglik, the angry astral effects of Mars will, according to Vedic astrology, make you a terrible spouse. You will sow disharmony in your wake. Your husband or wife might die. You yourself are virtually a walking soocide case. But wait! All is not lost. There is a cure.
If you marry a tree first, such as a Peepal tree, and then have it cut, OR marry a matka and then have it broken, the ill effects of your astrally doomed birthday are negated. Or, if you marry another manglik, the negative vibes you both exert on each other will cancel each other out. One doesn't know how this works egjactly, but one supposes that two fiery Martians experience what one can only read about in books (see kamasutra for a brief overview).
So, to summarize: two mangliks in love? Good. One manglik loving a non-manglik? Sadly, this is a formula for lau failure, unless you first find an aboreal roadside romeo, marry your dau off to it, then kill the tree. It's complicated, but what to say? WALTO.
Mainmacha: Mad or what? Of course I would. All you have to do is find a tree...
Dishoom Dishoom: You do realize that she's already married, right? And that I was asking a hypothetical question? And that you continue to be a bachelor? And that your prospects lessen with every passing year?
Mainmacha: Fine, find me the tree.
CategoriesFestivals and Religion
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CategoriesPhrases & Expressions
Aiyappashivan (aka Ivan): "Sorry boss, hand bag is full, see? Trying to travel light... y'know?"
Silesh (peering inside Samsonite): "What is this nonsense! You are having one toothbrush, one jeanspant, and 5 packages of some 100 something bloody beedis. That too 501s. Can't leave one or two and take some murukkus for Meenakshi or what?"
Ivan: "Sorry dude. My band mates, Jungle Fever and Magic Frowntain, only smoke 501 Mangalore Ganesh Beedis while we are performing"
Silesh: "Eh?? Band?"
Ivan: "Yea, we are a Deatbeats cover band..."
Silesh: "Hmm. Who are The Deadbeats?"
Ivan: "A Grateful Dead cover band......"
Silesh: "Ok bye! Good thing pa! Don't think Amma's murukkus would have made it to San Francisco!"
Every Delhi Girl In The World
Regionall over India
Terms referencing thisStand ateeze
"Have you looked in the Lost-and-Found'?
'Hey man, I forgot to bring by PT Tshirt today. Mazi sir is going to screw me'
'Why dont you borrow one from the lost-and-found'
'I looked man, but it does not have my house tshirt in my size ..'
The dreaded day of Rakshabandhan arrives and all the young males rise early, with trepidation, brush-teeth-wash-face, and shave even when most don't need to just to feel like a man. Today is the day that all the cutest girls in class are about slap the cuffs on the hopefuls and dub them Rakhi Brother. "Rise ye jilted child" they seem to say as you mope around suringified for the rest of the day.
But you are a valiant eng bai and emotions do not weigh heavily upon you so you recover quickly and realise that this dubious recognition is actually some form of attention, a unique connection that you can rely on to link the two of you, Rakhi Brother and Rakhi Sister, in a cosy social twosome.
"Aicchhhhh!" you think to yourself as you seek out your Rakhi Sister to attempt a leading conversation. This is where the reality begins.
Meena: So, what's the plan?
Shalini: We are all going to Corner House to have lamb burgers and Death by Chocolate yaar, are you and Sumant coming?
Sumant (brightening): W...
Meena (casual): Ya, I'll come
Shalini: And if you come then of course Sumant will come!
Meena (quickly): Please ya, he's my Rahki Brother!
Sumant (head hung low): Ya please, she's my Rakhi Sister.....